Amanda Finch – The Pleaser Pulverizer Fempower Coach

Do you struggle with or feeling like you need to

Prove yourself – Always chasing validation by showing you’re smart, capable, or worthy.

Secret Shame and Guilt – Holding on to painful memories of a time that you felt you had made a made a mistake you feel is to painful to share to begin the healing process? 

Act or Perform – Playing a role that meets expectations while hiding your authentic self.

Fake it – Acting like everything’s fine when it’s not, because showing vulnerability feels unsafe.

Be Pretty – Prioritizing how you look on the outside over what you feel on the inside.

Stay Silent – Keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself because of the potential of saying the wrong thing and hurting feelings or changing the dynamic in a relationship. 

Self-protect – Guarding your heart, energy and voice from real connection to avoid rejection or hurt. 

Excessive Worrying – persistent “what if” thinking about the future, even about small things.

Boundary Setting – allowing others to overstep into your boundaries.

Overthinking  – replaying conversations, decisions, or mistakes in their head.

Imagining the worst-case scenario is likely to happen.

Difficulty Concentrating – attention gets pulled toward worry or fear.

Perfectionism – setting unrealistically high standards to avoid criticism or mistakes.

Poor Sense of Inner-Knowing – not feeling sure of yourself when making decisions or choices.

Over Sensitivity – deeply tuned into others’ moods, tones, or approval/disapproval.

Avoiding – Steering clear of situations that trigger worry (social events, responsibilities, conflicts).

Procrastination – putting things off out of fear of failure or overwhelm.

Needing Reassurance – frequently checking with others (“Did I do that right?” “Are you upset with me?”).

People-Pleasing – saying yes out of fear of rejection or judgment, even when it harms their own needs.

Hypervigilance – constantly scanning for danger, threats, or negative outcomes.

Muscle Tension – especially in the jaw, neck, and shoulders.

Rapid Heartbeat or Freezing – body reacting as if it’s in danger.

Pressure – to hold it all together, even when you’re exhausted?

Feeling Disconnected From Your Body – as if floating away, blanking out and unable to recall details of conversations.

Stomach Issues – nausea, indigestion, or IBS-like symptoms (mind–gut connection is strong).

Exhaustion – feeling drained from constant worry, overthinking, or fear of judgement in social situations.

Fear of Rejection & Judgment – worrying excessively about what others think.

Avoiding Conflict – keeping peace at all costs, or shrinking you truth so noone feels uncomfortable. 

Difficulty Saying No – anxiety around expressing true opinions or disappointing others.

Empathy Excess– Frequently placing others’ needs above your own.

IS THIS YOU?

• I either trust others too much… or wall up my heart and can’t trust anyone at all.

• I feel anxious thinking others are constantly judging me.

• I feel like I’m always on stage — like people are watching and waiting for me to mess up.

• I feel guilty if I tell people “no” or get upset with them,

• I believe I can’t make mistakes.

• I make a big deal out of small issues.

• I worry far too much about what others think of me.

• I feel overly responsible for other people’s feelings, actions, or outcomes.

• I have trouble saying “no” — I say “yes” even when people don’t deserve it.

• Many people don’t reciprocate my kindness.

• I don’t know how to set healthy boundaries.

• I struggle to tap into my own feelings or inner knowing.

• It’s uncomfortable for me to explore my true thoughts or emotions — sometimes I even feel ashamed of them.

• I feel like I always have to be “good.”

• Life hasn’t rewarded me for being so nice.

• I’m kinder to others than I am to myself.

• I’m terrified of making mistakes and feel I have to work harder than everyone else.

• I use my appearance to project confidence I don’t feel inside.

• I freeze up or go blank when put on the spot.

• I often second-guess myself, even about simple choices.

• I feel guilty when I’m not helping others.

• It takes me a day or two to get clarity about even basic situations.

• I freeze and depend on others to be kind to me.

• I’m frustrated that I’m not more emotionally “evolved.”

• I suspect I’m emotionally immature.

• I feel stupid because it seems like everyone else knows more than I do.

• I don’t feel secure or grounded in myself.

• I compare myself to others to figure out who I’m supposed to be.

• I need to belong — without it, I feel like I’ll crumble.

• I’m ashamed I’m not further along in life.

• I feel deep shame or embarrassment over small mistakes.

• I hate my poor self-image.

• I don’t feel like I trust myself enough to hold solid opinions.

• I struggle to articulate my thoughts clearly.

• I need praise to feel normal — and I know that’s childlike.

• I feel like I have no backbone and can’t stand up for myself.

• Deep down, I feel empty and alone.

• My self-esteem revolves around how much others like me.

• I often don’t know what I want — or even what I’m saying.

• I’m disgusted by how lost I feel about who I am, how to feel, what to choose, or how to trust myself.

• I try to “keep the peace” at all costs.

• I feel like I have to be perfect so people won’t leave me.

• I ignore my feelings and just keep pushing forward.

• I feel responsible for other people’s mistakes.

• I can’t handle conflict.

• I feel like I’m grasping at straws when I’m overwhelmed.

• I worry constantly about others’ opinions of me.

• I struggle to speak with authority, and people don’t take me seriously.

• I don’t like myself.

• Deep down, I feel weak and spineless.

• Even people less educated than me seem to know more.

• I need help making decisions — even small ones.

• I never know if I’m making the right choice.

• If I’m not needed, I feel I have no purpose.

• I can’t make others uncomfortable, even if I’m deeply uncomfortable myself.

• I’m ashamed of how weak, vulnerable, and emotionally insecure I am.

• I feel like I have to pretend my life is together so people won’t reject me.

• I don’t believe I can make it on my own.

• I feel lost but keep pretending I’m okay.

• I connect my self-worth to how much I do or achieve.

• If I stop pretending, I don’t even know who I am.

• People-pleasing gives me a sense of purpose.

• I truly care for others more than I care for myself.

• I feel small and alone in a big, scary world.

• I rely on others’ approval to feel like I’m on the right path.

• I would fall apart if I were ridiculed.

• I believe that if someone truly loved me, I’d finally feel complete.

THERE IS A WAY OUT.

CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SHIFT…

• From stuck in self-doubt → to breaking free of limiting beliefs
• From being taught that vulnerabity was weakness → to understanding it is the key to unlocking our streangth
• From drained by old systems → to reclaiming your power from patriarchal conditioning
• From overwhelmed and frozen → to calm and regulated with simple techniques
• From spinning in endless thoughts → to asking the right questions that shift your reality
• From trapped in anxious loops → to navigating out quickly and with ease
• From living in obligation → to choosing freedom on your own terms
• From fearing anxiety → to using it as your hidden superpower
• From unclear and second-guessing → to seeing clearly what’s fact vs. fiction
• From disconnected from yourself → to stepping boldly into your authentic truth
• From held back by trauma and drama → to opening new doors of possibility

IF YOU DESIRE A CALMER, FULLER LIFE,

IT STARTS BY CHOOSING IT.

What would it take to release, uncreate, and destroy all of the rejections, separations, expectations, projections, obligations, polarizations, and considerations that have kept you stuck living in a reality of wasting your time pleasing others, who probably don’t even deserve you, to instead choosing a life of pleasure, peace, and possibilities? And if you had that, what else could you create?